Do you douche?

Batdamn sure does but only with maximum douche.

Before I begin with this article it has been brought to my attention that Chris Bores is saying stupid shit like I didn’t click that link then saying I clicked that link because I knew Lasersquad was a spy. The fact that he has over 20 different excuses shows that Chris is totally fucked since he can’t even keep his excuses straight. In fact, I don’t think he knows how I got his IP address. Let us all take a brief moment of silent laughter to mourn the hubris of mankind and the follies of its most pitiful…. Alrighty then! Besides Chris Bores took no liberties with the delete comment button. Let’s all party like its 1984!

Well its batdamn… he has many different accounts… MANY MANY DIFFERENT ACCOUNTS. Batdannight, Batdanmn, Batdamn and much much more. It’s like he decided that he would be Wild E. Coyote of youtube. If at first you don’t succeed, do the same thing that made you fail. I don’t even understand what his problem really is. He hates AVGN, he hates TGWTG and he hates the IGSUCKSBLOG. Well that’s not unnatural but since he’s #2 on this list its unsurprising that this will get worse.

His anti-TGWTG tendencies extend to the point that he has no perceivable concept of comedy and humor.  His humor has devolved to the point that it must ALWAYS be at another person’s expense. He can’t even make fun of ideals or concepts anymore and he has to sadistically target individuals. Well at least he’s funny right? NOPE instead he has to rely on not reading anything properly and exaggerating things. His constant humping of the Irate Gamer youtube comment section  just shows how totally fucking stupid he is.

Here’s a comment from his latest account:

“BatDaniel Wrote: ” IT is true though, Joe Haldnik really sucks are humor. I’m also surprised that Batdan didn’t point out that Chris Bores is still trying to market his work to children but includes sexual innuendos.” This level of obsession is always hilarious to me. :D”

So let me get this straight (and I am not quote mining him here). BatDaniel is the predicate as in the subject of the sentence. The objective of the sentence is to state that Batdaniel is obssessed by quoting Batdaniel’s statement about batdamn’s lack of humor and the disconnect between having child unfriendly humor and marketing to children. Batdaniel’s statement is perfectly normal; I am not exaggerating here. Batdaniel just said two things, Joe sucks at humor and Chris Bores is bad at marketing. None of this demonstrates obsession. Batdamn’s response? THIS EQUALS OBSESSION!? No wait he said This Level of obsession so the complete lack of obsession is funny to him? That’s not even a rebuttal either so he agrees that his humor sucks. Oh is he trying to pretend he’s not Joe Haldnik? EVEN WHEN HE’S DOING ALL THE SAME THINGS AND EVEN PARTIALLY ADMITING THAT HE LOST HIS OLD ACCOUNT DUE TO BEING A BUTTHURT LOSER? This is enough insanity to have someone admitted to a mental institution. His new account even has the same stupid “it gets funnier” picture on his youtube account.

NO ONE IS LAUGHING BATDAMN! NOT YOU, NOT ME, NOT YOUR OPPOSITION, NOT EVEN LULZ COW CHRIS BORES is laughing.

And I’m not even done talking about his anti-social tendencies. He has a MASSIVE SUPERIORITY COMPLEX. His thinking and spelling skills are absolutely autistic too. Take a look at any of the edits he has made on the Irate Gamer wiki.

http://irategamerdoesnotsuck.wikia.com/wiki/Special:Contributions/68.51.85.3

Literally all the 30 pages that were there when Mr.Killultra first arrived there were started by him. He is THAT OBSESSED WITH IRATE GAMER. But let’s just take a look at his edits, I mean I could excuse him if he did good work and wrote informative almost good cyber-citizen material right?

“Shadow Overlord is the secondary antagonist of the Irate Gamer show, and the Evil Gamer’s new master”

WHAT? Shadow OVERLORD IS THE MAIN FUCKING VILLAIN, HE OWNS EVIL GAMER! HOW IS HE A SECONDARY IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM? what? is it because evil overload has less screen time? I’m not even getting into to the fact that he actually takes the Irate Gamer Show’s plot seriously. If you were looking at the show like the average viewer then there’s only one villain on the show, Chris Bores. The fact that Batdamn is going a long way to write this the same way Chris Bores would write this is just disturbing. He put a lot of thought into these articles, even writing copy-right friendly names for copyrighted characters such as preaditor and the always cute and clever assasanate.

“The Preaditor revealed itself at the end and tried to kill Chris with a gun. Chris dodged and attacked the Preaditor. Though the two were evengly matched at first, Irate Gamer soon over powered the Preaditor and killed it with its own gun.”

OH lord he’s trying to make the Irate Gamer show appear epic. I’m just gonna say I like Mr.KILL’s outside of the box writing. Hell Mr.KILL even spells better, the wiki doesn’t have a spell check but he sure as hell makes words that look that like words!

“Apperently” – http://irategamerdoesnotsuck.wikia.com/wiki/Shadow_Overlord?oldid=3871

I’m sorry I just can’t get over this. JOE HALDNIK! YOU SPELT APPARENTLY WITH AN E IN THE WRONG SPOT! DO YOU TRY TO READ WHAT YOU WRITE?

“hench”- SAME FUCKING PAGE

HOW DO YOU MAKE THESE MISTAKES? HENCH!? HENCH!? YOU MEANT TO WRITE HENCE!! AN H DOES NOT MAKE THE SAME SOUND AS AN E! YOU FAIL! FAIL!

You know what Norman Bores needs? A fan who can actually represent him without making him look like an idiot. Batdamn can’t spell, can’t use logic, can’t read and can’t write a decent rebuttal in his fucking life. The sad part about all this is that HE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH THIS.

You see, there was an unusual two week downtime for Constantine Cherynobyl (his previous and now defunct account).  During this time period Constantine Cherynobyl actually moved and so he deleted his facebook page and hid all traces of who he was so he could continue the thankless job of being an asshole. FORTUNATELY THIS MEANT THE OPERATION WOULDN’T FAIL! You see blasze went down over these two weeks and if you had clicked a link while Blasze was down, then boom you’d fail to be redirected as if nothing had happened and instead ended up the blasze website with a cannot connect message. THIS WOULD HAVE TIPPED HIM OFF THAT WE WERE TRACKING HIM. Considering how stupid he is though its debatable as to whether or not he would still fall for it anyway.

I actually got him twice but I’m gonna post the one since the other is pointless. Also since he deleted his youtube account (actually youtube slapped him silly) his pm’s also vanished. I see youtube likes erasing people.

http://blasze.tk/track/9B5T0J/

That’s him once again on the third IP address. 112.201.191.11. The IP address seems to be moving though so either He’s on vacation or he swapped his ip again.

Well there’s just one last question to ask. Is there hope for Joe Haldnik?

“He’s gonna take all of your cash

To make a shitty film that sucks ass

He’d rather fuck a buffalo

Than lose money, his number one fear

He’d gonna put a massive hole

In the pockets of his fans, you see

He’s the greediest gamer you’ve ever heard

He’s the E-Begging Nintendo Nerd

He’s the Cheetahmen 2 Scam-Running Conman Nerd

He’s the E-Begging Video Game Nerd” – Batdamn’s song (Aka how to be not clever and let everyone know you’re an idiot)

Well at least he can escape into his childish fantasies.

OH and Joe? You can’t sue or take any action towards me because I have not revealed any information that was private. You gave your name on a facebook page because you gave your IP address on the Irate Gamer wiki. We get it JOE your true love with Irate Gamer will never be requited but keep your hatred off the internet and away from the people who don’t deserve it.

Things I didn’t mention:

1. His attempts to impersonate Batdan

2. His attempts to own Mr.KillUltra (which just involved putting his name in places)

3. His list of ‘people I’ve owned’

4. Fwanksajerk (who will be on this list, which also means there are two people as stupid as batdamn is)

5. His attempt to post TGWTG videos

6. His subscribing to My little pony deviantart pages after constantly saying he hates the franchise.

7. His constant need to resort to banning and deleting people’s comments

8. The fact that he constantly thinks sex = good.

9. The fact that he thinks looks = funny. Only children find the look of someone funny

10. His complete lack of subtity

11. The fact that he has so many problems that I could probably write list

12. The fact that he constantly states that commenting back = getting owned even when he does most of the replying and That’s the only way to continue a conversation.

13. He thinks that everyone who disagrees with him or mentions AVGN is an AVGN fanboy.

14. He had a wife but never mentions her anymore. The fact that he treats women as sex objects also adds credibility to certain theories.

EDIT: Wow he is slow to the punchline

http://s1363.photobucket.com/user/DouchebagIsYou57/media/ProofthatladybugginisntChrisBoresmom_zps5f4a449d.png.html?sort=3&o=0

So Ladybuggin straight out says, “I’m not linda aka Chris’s Mom the person she has been pretending to be for years now”. Batdamn is too damn busy thinking about himself and not about the actual conversation writes (paraphrased) “They always call you chris or linda and me Joe Haldnik. Logic is above them”. This is definitive proof that he is totally fucking delusional. For Years, Batdamn has been defending irate gamer and stating that ladybuggin is his mom. His new account Jonathan Hardwick writes in the same manner, makes the same statements and has the same lack of humor or logic (in addition to the same picture, admitting it was his new account among several other telling factors). Ladybuggin flat out tells him that she has been lying to him for years and he responds in a narcissistic manner that only covers his own ass. This is why you are #2 on this list Batdamn, you are a narcissist, you only think about yourself and can’t even being to consider what other people actually think with a reasonable degree of accuracy. You always claim that things that happen to you (such as your channel getting pwned) are the work of butthurt people. You probably don’t even know what the word butthurt even means… do you?

For those who don’t know, butthurt means to be angry over something which is not an injustice or to put more anger than necessary. So essentially Batdamn is saying that he should not be banned for violating youtube community guidelines such as posting fake videos, posting videos to inspire hate and consistently harassing people by calling them out for no reason. Hell the amount of slander he is throwing at Jdup is enough get him banned yet again. The other thing he doesn’t realize is that youtube will ignore flags from more than one person.

Official from youtube’s blog

“Myth #2: If I repeatedly flag a video, it will come down.

Truth: No matter how many times you flag Baby, it will not come down. It’s been flagged. We’ve reviewed it. And it does not violate our Community Guidelines. If you’ve considered spearheading a flagging campaign to bring down a video you don’t like, save yourself the time. Videos that don’t violate our Guidelines simply won’t be taken off the site for policy reasons.”

So yeah Batdamn why haven’t you gotten your other accounts back? Its because you are a narcissist and refuse to accept your role in your own stupidity. Saying that other people are BUTTHURT also proves how completely delusional you are by implying that its okay to:

1. say other people are crazy. Like literally every single comment is you saying someone is crazy

2.to have a people I’ve owned list. Which includes people you’ve never even owned is just an internet hit list.

3.to completely fill Irate Gamer’s comment section (yeah its not like that’s a tell tale sign you are batdamn) with unsatisfactory retorts. Calling every critic an AVGN fan is just despicable and you’re only feeding the anti-irate Gamer sentiment by doing that.

5.being completely tasteless with your humor

6. Be completely shameless and anti-social

7.attempt to impersonate someone by claiming to have their first and last names. Good job pretending to have batdan’s first and last names. Its a nice way of showing that you’re not envious of him. I’m reading the blog now and realize that don’t get as trolled on daily basis, but YOU DO. Maybe you are doing something wrong?

8. Have a doublestandard and allow Chris to do whatever he wants including lying to you and deliberately running a troll operation. There even several comments that Joe haldnik has made that literally say that the humor and effort put into the AVGN show (keep in mind this was before James had a baby and started ad libing his scripts) and the TGWTG shows are less than the effort put into the Irate Gamer show. Batdamn even has said that these shows are equal and anyone who says the opposite is blind.

Example:

“The same standards of criticism don’t really work on AVGN and TGWTG. They’re work is well performed, well executed and the scripts are based on factual and sourced information. Their jokes are (mostly) fresh and their humor is a lot better than IG’s make random comparison.” -Signed Mr.KILL

“I love the utter lack of objectivity in your comments, dude. 😀 So by your logic, AVGN and TGWTG cannot be criticized, and only IG could. 😀 Read you loud and clear, fanboy. :D” – signed Batdamn

Mr.Kill wrote same standards, implying that AVGN and TGWTG rarely get in trouble with things like ‘bad acting’, pointless comparisons, completely nonsensical information and padding (and I can’t believe I have to point this out but yeah they don’t really have to deal with that). Mr.Kill essentially says that since the work demonstrates more effort and production values they must evaluated at a much harsher level compared to Irate Gamer’s amateur writing, humor and review skills. If one were mark an AVGN or TGWTG episode with standard applied to Irate Gamer show, you would find that AVGN and TGWTG would (even at their worst) would break the scale in the positive end. Batdamn’s response? Obviously Mr.Kill is ignoring stuff and thus saying that AVGN and TGWTG are untouchable… that’s no where near what Mr.KILL said. Case in point.

9. Engage in textbook cyberbullying. Seriously, try to make a point without taking it to the personal level. Batdamn has severe trouble doing that.

10. Continue to practice faulty logic. (A wise man by the name of Clifford said that if you believe things without sufficient evidence, YOU MAKE IT A HABIT to believe false things) Considering how completely indoctrinated Batdamn appears to be in Irate Gamer culture (if you can even call it culture since its based on hating everything) Batdamn appears to have completely checked out in the logic department. Batdamn believes everything that Irate Gamer says even if he has to practice doublethink to accept it. Ladybuggin tells him he’s not Irate gamers mom? Accepted without a wink, continue hating on people who want me to reform. And of course this faulty logic finally accumulates in:

11. The biggest problem of all, not having a single sense of humility and an over-inflated sense of self-importance. That song he wrote on AVGN is neither clever nor does it actually fit AVGN’s theme song. His attempt to paint the IG sucksblog as diehard loser fans of Irate Gamer was doomed to fail from the beginning but it stop him from thinking he wasn’t a diehard loser fan of Irate Gamer. His accomplishments (that aren’t failures) are so miniscule I can’t even list them. The only way he wins an argument is by deleting comments and he uses the delete button consistently even pretending he owned someone by deleting their replies and pretending they never existed. He also consistently tried to get Mr.Killultra banned from the wiki and also consistently tried to ban users who posted his Facebook information (a page which he later deleted) and its uncanny resemblance to his ip address , yeah way to show you’re not butthurt over that buddy.

I’m not even sure if Batdamn should be #2. He appears to be more crazy than Chris Bores is. But then again, without Chris Bores, Joe Haldnik wouldn’t be as totally messed up and out of touch with reality as he is now.

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6 thoughts on “Do you douche?

  1. Now I’d like you to tear apart Asalieri and him betraying all his criticism on Bores to befriend him and his “mom” and continue posting more attacks on James Rolfe and TGWTG even after he initially stated he would avoid TGWTG.

      1. Well his sudden befriending with Bores has been something that’s been tinkering my nerves since April 1st, a April Fools’ joke with no end; after the day was over, Asa would stay a friend with Bores, and like Batdamn, Asa obsesses over James Rolfe’s “ebegging” routines, not knowing of Boes’ long history of cyber-criticism.

        Really, the guy is a mess; Just look at his “Reviewing a Couple Commentators”, Kickstarter Nightmares #2 (he puts James off the hook but then a vid or two later he plays as “Rames Jolfe” whom insists he used all the money to buy a giant mansion closing with “Thanks Suckers!”, and the April Fools’ video. RAR 29 and the opionons on Linkara’s vid on Adblockers also heavily contradicts what he said about not attacking TGWTG or mentioning said site or it’s members negatively. Yes James and Doug’s main show do have a few questionable side-points with their more recent episodes, the Ikari Warriors and Toxic Avengers AVGNs and plot-heavy new era Nostalgia Crtic episodes especially, but I still do follow what they post just to hope it’s watchable, while Asa constantly betrays his promises and also glances over what he disliked about Bores.

        I’m sure you can figure out the rest from his many other videos.

      2. What I meant by my previous post was that there already certain people guaranteed to be on the list.

        You have successfully predicted that acetylsalicylic acid will be next on this list. And trust me, its gonna take more than asprin to cure his bullshit.

  2. I honestly don’t know who this Asa person is, and from what I’ve heard about him, I really don’t care to. I look forward to seeing your roast on him, though. He sounds like he could use it.

    1. Honestly, the less known the better. I’ve watched maybe a few videos of his, and can’t say that I’m a fan. In all honesty though, it’s more his attitude and need for internet drama than anything else. I honestly believe the guy could be entertaining if he actually focused more on actual being creative than just going on and on over internet drama. That’s my 2 cents anyways.

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